It ‘aint what you do, it’s the way that you do it….and that’s what….
So recently a client and friend of mine attended an event where they were given the opportunity to speak and tell their story of how they got to where they are right now. He’s a very successful businessman and has changed his life, his business and his path massively over the last 18 months.
Enter a wolf in sheep’s clothing. A well known and ‘respected’ business owner that approached my client and asked for a short meeting after their talk. The soul reason they had come to this event was to hear him speak and chat to him afterwards.
The speech went well, with plenty of people wanting to talk to him after the event, but then he got to sit down with the person that had travelled miles to see him. The next ten minutes were spent in a one-way conversation where this colleague in the industry told him, in no uncertain terms, that he should stick to something else because he had ‘no right’ to be helping others in other fields of business. All of a sudden we have doubt. Grave doubt.
It’s an amazing feeling doubt, because it can paralyse you. It can rob you of your creativity and imagination. It robs you of the wanting to ‘grow’ as a person, let alone a business. And it ends up taking away the one thing that none of us have an infinite supply of…time and energy.
A few days later on our coaching session he told me this story, with the words, “I know I shouldn’t let it get to me….but it did.” Now having had the venom of another such ‘professional’ in an industry where I dared to be more slightly more successful than them, create a ‘first’ in an industry, (which they still copy today and claim to have been their idea!), and always delivered on what I said I was going to do, I ABSOLUTELY understand where my client was coming from. The doubt and intimidation undermined my business and my confidence. The way in which I let it get to me, affect me, affect the business and affect my personal and business relationships is still something I’m not proud of. But I put it right with a strategy.
Firstly we talked about his successes to date.
Secondly we began to focus on the differences they had made to other business owners.
Thirdly we began to look at his social proof with the knowledge that he was freely imparting and the recommendations that they had gained over the last six months because of it.
And lastly we looked at where he had come from and the ways of them pushing on and growing their business.
We then looked at his colleague in the industry. This was uncomfortable for the client because idiots like me often say that your biggest competitor is just ‘yourself’ and there is always a danger that they may well be better than you. We later moved on and talked about where my clients strengths really lay, as at no time have they ever, or would want to, intimidate a competitor in the way that this person had done to them. They were the better person and I’m telling you now, they will be the happier and better business for it.
My client is now more secure in their own ‘business skin’ and has begun to truly understand the value of their hard-earned knowledge in their field of expertise. The doubts moved to one side, which if they had been allowed to fester, could have crippled him and his growing business.
Tackle doubt head on. Tackle business bullies head-on. It ‘aint what you do, it’s the way that you do it…and that’s what can ruin your reputation…
Your Best Kept Business Secret